This Is An Outrage

School stuff aside, I have discovered something so cruel and inhumane that I can barely bring myself to write it down.
But I will.
Household Male and I took a small trip to the Ingles on Merrimon Ave. the other day for some essentials and found this in the coffee isle, sitting innocently next to the acrid "grind-your-own" station...This is torture. How long will the City of Asheville forbid this fine establishment from joining our happy city?! Why was Krispy Kreme ushered in and Dunkin' Donuts denied?! How long must we stand for this injustice?! You put a Starbucks next to the historic Biltmore Estate. Don't think I didn't notice that. I'm onto you.
Without so much as a rumor about a DD being built anywhere near here, they've decided to stock our shelves with the tantalizing and unattainable! This is an outrage. The fact that this precious little bag costs nearly $9 is even more of an outrage.
OK, so at least we now have access to some Dunkin' grounds, but to suffer the sight of the cheery orange bag in the morning and not drift off to Donut Dreamland is unthinkable.
How dare you, City of Asheville. I demand a Dunkin' Donuts. I demand that you build one immediately, employ every incoherent and incompetent 16 year old that it can fit, and fill my coffee order! (By the way, it's a number 1, large, with a jelly and maple frosted. Get to work!)